You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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