I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize