he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
