So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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