I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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