Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I queefed so loud it echoed.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
