I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
