xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
