She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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