I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
