imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
