woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
