What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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