i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
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