I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
