I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
