Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Randomize
