i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Randomize