I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Can I color on your dick again?
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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