You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
