He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
