the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
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You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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