yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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