Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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