i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
