okay pat passed out under dana's car
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Life is so much better after having sex.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
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