Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
