Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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