Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
