I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
