sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
