tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
My feet surprised me
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
