You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
