DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
