if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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