there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
a search helicopter?!
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
