I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
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