Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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