You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Where did you get a picture of my penis
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
