are you so shy because you have an std?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Your penis caused this!
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
