butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
