hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
