How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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