Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Randomize
