I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
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