when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize