So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
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I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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