we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
