bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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