what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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