Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(760): View more from California

Joe is yelling at the trees again.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

omg every time its on

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(660): View more from Missouri

Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart

(281): View more from Texas

What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?

(660): View more from Missouri

Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni

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(409): View more from Texas

just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome

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(847): View more from Illinois

He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?

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(805): View more from California

The air was thick with penises

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(813): View more from Florida

I have bits of ceiling fan all over now

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(410): View more from Maryland

Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?

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